Off the AppStore: "A lighter take with i have no clean clothes and i must clean"

• An endless stair-master into DARKNESS!
• Laundry is your lifeline; keep your rhythm, keep moving
• The chasing monster isn't the only threat on the stairs

Welcome to Off The AppStore, a weekly feature with a twist. Namely, that while these - as with all the games we cover here - are games that you can play on your phone, they're ones that operate outside of the realms of the big two ways to play: The Google Play Store and the Apple AppStore.

That means that there might be a bit of work required in downloading alternative AppStores or APKs, or that the games can simply be played in your phone browser. We'll make sure to detail that for each game though. Anyway, read on to find a new game or experience to play Off The AppStore.

One truth that can still amaze is just how OLD some ideas really are. Did you know that the very rational fear of computers taking over the world was iconically 'horrified' in the 1967 story, I Have No Mouth and I Must Scream by Harlan Ellison? Computers were barely even a thing back then, and already someone was painting a post-apocalyptic scenario about a supercomputer with a grudge against humanity that tortures that last handful of survivors endlessly for amusement. Yeah, so, Robobarbie looked at that story and said, "But what if laundry?"

This led to the release of i have no clean clothes and i must clean. Think back to your past (or present) when you lived with someone your age, and it came to doing chores. Laundry is inevitable, and you need clean clothes for… reasons that should be obvious to you. Unfortunately, the laundry machine is located at the bottom of the stairs in your building, and it's your turn to do the wash. Your roommate has left you to the fates of whatever lurks in the awaiting darkness.

With your laundry in hand and customisable legs, you must quickly descend the stairs while the entity that everyone knows is always there whenever you turn off the lights hunts you. You can't defend yourself against that, but other monsters will appear ahead of you, on the steps, and emerging from the dark. You must use your feet, hands, and dirty undies to swipe back at them before they take a bite out of you. But remember that you can't stop; you tap left and right to muster the courage and coordination to keep descending, and maybe you'll reach the machine, but probably not.

It's fun and funny to come across things like i have no clean clothes and i must clean because it demonstrates that creativity can do anything. In this case, some folks took one of the most terrifying and disturbing stories of all time and twisted it into a stair-descending game about laundry. If this isn't a sign to clean up your act and get on that project you've been putting off, then who knows what is?

You can find i have no clean clothes and i must clean on its itch.io page right here!